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  • Writer's pictureCC. Carpenter

"I have a bad tendency to make a cheeky comment or seek redress when wronged..."

” .....but today I humored her, " Nancy Paris-Russo said in 'A Woman of Culture: A Novel', (chapter 9, page 130)


We know what if feels like to taste bad words in our mouth. To react, to retaliate, to make a cheeky comment when feel we've been wronged by another. We also know what if feels like when bad or hurtful words are 'thrown at us' from another's mouth. In each and every exchange of words we have an opportunity to pause and choose how we respond: to 'seek redress' or to choose the 'higher road'. They say managing conflict with humor can help diffuse a heated conversation and smooth over differences of opinion. On that day and in that occasion Nancy choose humor in her response to Carolina's hurtful words that minimized what could have been a very unwanted heated discussion at a party.


Infusing humor in a tense situation can relax the body, calm ones thinking process, and inspire you forward for the greater good of humanity; and avoid an unwanted scene at a party! They say emotional intelligence is the ability to understand and manage ones emotions and it played an a big part in Nancy's state of mind when she chose the 'high road' in her response to Carolina, her sister-in-laws, frivolous and hurtful comments towards her at the party. Had Nancy not reacted with emotional intelligence, with humor, in that particular occasion the party could have been ruined with the scene that was about to unfold before everyone's eyes.


In life we have an opportunity to turn a bad conversation around simply by the way we respond to another. We can take the emotional intelligence route to walk away or to infuse humor into the situation or we can choose to retaliate for the hurtful words caused. Everyone has the freedom to choose how to respond and how we choose determines how brave we are to listen to our gut, to listen to our inner voice that asks for peace allowing us to transcend the moment or ignore it and continue on by causing a scene or an unwanted further exchange of words.


Words spoken can cut like a knife or spread like butter. The power of our words that come from our mouth is in our hands and was in Nancy's hands in how she responded to Carolina's criticism of her that day at the Christmas party!



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